There are lots of things you cannot control – the economy, the way others think or behave, the price of eggs, world conflict, Kim Jong-Un, to name a few. And it could be easy to focus on everything you can't control and forget that you have control over you, your life, and how you choose to see it. In a fear-based culture, there is a tendency to dwell on negativity... What if this happens and what if that happens? People ruminate on negative possibilities.
If you choose to watch the news, you might end up being a wreck. Unpleasant events dominate and it becomes vogue to talk about problems and it can be easy to transfer this victim concept to yourself - poor me. “Why is everything happening to me?" “Life is a struggle!” Blah, blah, blah. With the preponderance of negativity, you get pulled down and feel unmotivated, even depressed. Negativity results in loss of focus, movement, direction and energy. BUT it doesn’t have to be that way.
In moments of loss (or things not turning out as planned), it is the measure of a person as to how he responds. We can believe that each loss is a terrible tragedy and we are losers, or deal with each experience (job, relationship, strategy, interaction) as an opportunity to pick ourselves up, learn something new, or take a different approach. Helen Keller said it well, “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.”
In other words, we don't know everything and let's enjoy the process. Take note of some folks who "failed" in their ventures before they saw the glimmer of success. Bill Gates is a prime example. Even though he is one of the richest people on earth, Gates has had his share of failures. For example his first business called, Traf-O-Data crashed and burned. Undaunted Gates and his partner Paul Allen moved on to form one of the most profitable companies in the history of the world – Microsoft. His idea of putting a computer in every home seems to have panned out.
We are driving cars right now because of the genius of Henry Ford. His global vision was that consumerism was the key to peace. He acted on that idea by creating methods of mass production of inexpensive goods, high wages for workers, and systematically lowering costs. All of which resulted in technical and business innovations, including a franchise system for Ford dealerships. Yet, along the way, he had his failures. His Detroit Automobile Company went out of business and the Edzel car was not a market success.
There are many other stories. Each of these people did not let loss or failure get in his way. They saw each experience as a stepping-stone to get strong and become successful. In other words, they learned as they went alone. All great leaders do! Albert Einstein failed in his college entrance exams; Thomas Edison conducted thousands of unsuccessful experiments before finally perfecting the light bulb and other inventions. In fact, Edison used his failures to construct his successes. In his mind, each “failure” illustrated what did not work so he could discover what did.
All of these people failed according to the facts. Yet, if you were to focus on their failures, you would never guess their impact on the world, which was far-reaching and profound. They literally changed we the way we live our lives. Gates, Einstein, Edison, Ford, and all successful people, refused to let failure get in their way and it didn't stop them. The thing that holds people back is “what they think they aren’t.” (I’m not smart, inventive, social, graceful, clever, witty, etc.)
If you turn this around, you can decide what you are and you thereby convert negative, static energy into forward thrust (movement and power). It can sound like this: “I am determined, persevering, good at math, science, conversation, polo,” etc.)
You must agree to a positive self-image to bring your energy up and tap into your source of inspiration and motivation. What you control is yourself – your vision, determination, and desire. Take command and alter your destiny. Then no matter how many challenges \you experience, you will continue to move forward.
The edict is, “if you think you can, you can and if you think you can’t, you can’t. Either way you are right.” Psychologist, Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “Failure is an illusion. No one ever fails at anything. Everything you do produces a result.” If someone throws you a ball and you drop it; you did not fail. Instead, you say, “throw it again.” Soon you are catching the ball.
Jean Walters is a best selling author. You can find her books on Amazon.com - search for jean walters, author. To contact jean: firstname.lastname@example.org