Look at dreaming – our brain is designed for dreaming. Can you imagine how people create their ego illusions? For instance victimhood. The particular slant that a person takes to support the idea of victimhood is to look at each situation from the point of how I didn’t get my fair share, how this situation went against my preconceived ideas of how things should be, how I am being short changed, how I got ripped off, taken advantage of, etcetera.
In other words, it is all about ME! Conversely, a “winning-successful” person will look to see how he came out ahead, what is the gift the situation offers, how people are trying to be helpful, what strategy he will use to move ahead, etc. The idea that pain is bad is an illusion. Most people cannot grow without pain as it is the catalyst that disrupts the ego. The ego wants security and attempts to find it by looking to the physical world, which is NEVER secure. (It is never stable or unchangeable.)
As long as we are attached to ego cravings, they control us and they create blocks to realization of connection to the Higher Mind, Infinite Self. These blocks begin to disintegrate when we start disciplining the mind by refusing to placate the ego. If it is going off in unrelenting chatter, you can shock it by jumping into an ice-cold pond (or shower). You are saying, I, the spiritual being, is in charge here. I will choose what to concentrate on. You must take control of the chatter, refuse to listen to it. Place your attention elsewhere.
The story of mathematics professor, John Nash, profiled in the movie A Beautiful Mind, makes the point. Nash, who actually had a mental disorder, was asked if he still sees the imaginary people. He answered, “Yes he does but he doesn’t give then any attention.” Ignoring imaginary people or random chatter is like releasing fear, if you give it attention, you empower it. When you ignore it, it withers away.
The ego is the same. The more attention you give its demands, the more it controls you. When you ignore it and move to a higher focus to achieve peace, for example, and use discipline, exercise, nutritional balance, meditation, as tools -- it is weakened. Then it can be relegated to the back corner of your mind and ignored.
You must discover your level of desire. Desire creates commitment. Commitment to discipline your lower mind (ego) so that you can achieve connection to your Higher Self as the only way you will experience peace. Thus, we examine our illusions to determine if it is time to let them go, if you want something more, if you want to create new goals and dreams.
Example: I put myself in situations to be criticized because my illusion is that people can’t support me as a fringe dweller; that my independence is an affront to them; that they feel I am taking something from them (attention?); that when I show my power, commitment, intensity to cause, they are intimidated. As a result, I draw insecure people to me so that my drama / illusion can continue - that these insecure people will criticize because that is what insecure people do.
Story: Meryn created the illusion of being cut off because she allowed her passion to be cut off (believed she was not good enough). She listened to her parents and let their nit picking have meaning for her. Thus, beyond decorating her house, she had no passion. Yet she knew she had talent and was good at loving and encouraging people.
Meryn got lost when she placed attention on the outer material world (people and circumstances) and tried to make it her focus. But she eventually re-connected to her True Self by accepting she had value as a person; that no one had the right to put her down; and by having her own identity – separate from parents and husband – and in the process, she dissolved the illusion of not being good enough. By reclaiming herself, she was able to live a life of passion.
How does Meryn’s story relate to yours?
Jean Walters is a Personal Growth Consultant and Transformational Coach. To contact her go to email@example.com or 314 991 8439 or 314 566 5231